


Nightly Contemplations

by wyntirrose



Category: Transformers Generation One
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2012-10-02
Packaged: 2017-11-15 11:27:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/526791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wyntirrose/pseuds/wyntirrose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Smokescreen contemplates his love life. Or lack thereof.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nightly Contemplations

**Author's Note:**

> Short fic written for the prompt: "Must I lie in this bed alone?" taken from Poem #3 of the Ogura Hyakunin Isshu (a Japanese collection of 100 poems by various authors)

When was it that I started to care? When was it that I allowed those pesky morals and ethics to get in the way of a good time? Back in the Golden Age I never had a problem with taking anything and everything that I wanted. It was just so very easy to just give in to my more hedonistic urges and convince everyone else to come along with me for the ride. And then the war started and I joined the Autobots. You’d think that things would have changed then. You’d think that the chaos and destruction would have put a crimp in my activities. Funny how the fear of death and the end of all things sane leads to even more passion and debauchery than there ever was in peace time. Certainly the new Autobot moral code and the ethics of PsyOps didn’t stop me from bedding my patients. Didn’t stop them from bedding me either.

So when did it all change? When did those nagging doubts take over? When did I actually start caring about my fellow mechs? I’m tempted to say that it’s because I can’t get away from my colleagues, that I have to face them when the morning after rolls around. Deep down though I know it’s something more than that. Maybe it’s because I’m the secret keeper for the lot of them. I know all the demons they carry around with them and I’m the only one who can help to exorcise them.

That answer’s far too simplistic too. I just have to face the fact that after millions of vorns maybe I’ve finally started to mature and evolve into something more than the con artist I used to be. The knowledge should make me happy. After all, growth is a good thing. At least that’s what I tell my patients. And yet somehow that knowledge doesn’t make the long lonely nights any easier.

It used to be that I could talk anyone into my berth, so why is it that I now spend every night alone?


End file.
